By Jennifer McDougall
Have you ever felt so heartbroken and lost after a breakup or tragic loss that suddenly took you by surprise? Unfortunately, most rehab facilities don’t provide you with the tools you need to deal with heartbreak in recovery, making it quite difficult to cope with the overwhelming pain and discomfort heartbreak brings upon a person’s physical and emotional state.
Recently, I had a conversation with a friend of mine who reached out to me for some advice on the subject as he is currently dealing with his own excruciating undertaking of heartbreak due to a recent breakup. The unanswered questions, the troubling confusion of what went wrong, the space of what was once filled with love and laughter now an aching sorrow of remorse and hopelessness.
Where does one turn for relief—for comfort in such a hurtful situation?
When you’re in recovery, and you have been so courageous to choose to live a sober lifestyle, turning to drugs and alcohol is not an option. We need a community of caring individuals who are there for us to lean on and seek guidance from. Every situation is a little different, and each one of us is certainly created differently, so our thinking process may not be the same as the person next to us. Still, one thing always remains the same—with a strong and reliable group of even a few people, it always makes the difference between being alone and being heard.
Maybe we don’t understand immediately what went wrong or why we ended up having our hearts completely shredded to pieces without even the slightest explanation. Maybe we do have a sense of what went wrong, and we feel remorseful about it and full of regret. Maybe you said something a bit much, or the person you were in love with realized the two of you just were not a good match for one another. Maybe you cheated. Maybe they cheated. Maybe they had a secret they were keeping could no longer go on living a lie. The possibilities are nearly endless as to why a relationship comes to an end. All we know is the only reasonable option is to pick yourself up off the ground and start to rebuild your confidence and keep trucking on down the road with a sense of greater purpose and determination.
How can you mend your broken heart?
Make peace with the pain rather than escaping your heartache.
At Passages, we want to help you heal and move on so you can be clear on what to learn from this experience and grow from it. Here are 7 tips you can put into play throughout the coming days.
- Get out our journal and put pen to paper. Write down your thoughts, your feelings, all about the relationship that can help you process everything you’ve been holding inside. If you need help with journal ideas, use journal prompts.
- Get outside and exercise. One of the best things you can do right now pulls yourself out of that bed or off the couch and get outside to exercise in the fresh air. Whether it be a few powerful laps in the pool or a run around the block– do it. Releasing endorphins and increasing your circulation with physical activity will help you feel a heck of a lot better.
- Get social and stay connected with friends and family. You mustn’t isolate yourself during this time. For your emotional and mental well-being, it is recommended that you check in with loved ones at least once a day, even if the time is brief– talk to them over the phone, grab a meal outside of the house together, go for a nature walk, or watch a movie together. Any one of these activities will help you feel less alone and more involved socially than static and depressed.
- Volunteer your time to a cause you care about. Something is gratifying when you lend a hand in your local community to help causes in need. It could be a simple dog walking for your local animal shelter or being a mentor to a little boy or girl at the local Boys and Girls Club. Many organizations post opportunities online to make it easy for you to connect and make a difference in other people’s lives. What better way to heal from your own misery than to help someone less fortunate in need.
- Maintain a healthy diet by eating and drinking nutritious foods that will give your body the fuel and strength you need to fight off illness, build and support muscle mass, and keep your energy level balanced. Staying hydrated is also a key factor in having a healthy intake regimen. Avoid drugs and alcohol as these substances are harmful to your body and impair decision-making decisions, leading to more problems down the road.
- When you look good, you’ll feel better. Dress up a little. Ladies: put some makeup on and do something different with your hair. Take care of your personal hygiene and maybe buy a new perfume or cologne. Get a haircut and your nails done. Polish up your look, because let’s are honest, when you look good, you feel good!
- Travel outside your normal day-to-day scene to expand your horizons. One thing that has always helped me when I’ve gone through a breakup is to travel. It’s more therapeutic than you may think. Changing up your view, stepping outside of your comfort zone, and feeling empowered to be on your own is something that will give you a nice boost of confidence, knowing you can’t be held down regardless of how terrible this person has made you feel. This is your time to do something for yourself. Live a little and have fun.
Stay focused on your goals during this troubling time you’re going through. Turn your pain into power and create something wonderful from your experience.
If you have any other tips or ideas you would like to add to this list; please feel free to comment below. We love hearing from our readers and what you have to say. Together we can make a difference in this world by helping one another pull through the challenges thrown at us on this road called life. There will be good days, and there will be days when you may find it hard to get out of bed. No matter how you feel, who you are, or where you come from, we want you to know you can achieve remarkable things if you set your mind to yourself and work hard towards your goals.
How to Contact Passages Addiction Treatment Centers:
Call Passages Addiction Treatment Centers today if you or a loved one is battling an addiction to drugs and/or alcohol. Our admissions department is available 24/7 and can be reached directly by calling our toll-free number (888) 397-0112. We look forward to speaking with you soon.
Featured photo by Nijwam Swargiary